This is one way to deal with those pesky vegetarians: eat all the vegetarian food.

But be warned, you may find yourself having to struggle through mountains and mountains of lentils, tofu and couscous. Push through! It’s going to hurt them a lot more than it hurts you. The look on a vegetarians face when they discover that the only things left to eat on the table are undercooked steaks and non-descript sausages is priceless. My only concern is that eating too much tofu might somehow turn you into a vegetarian in the same way that eating a zombie turns you into a zombie or something (I don’t really care for zombie movies. Hollywood stop making zombie movies), but so far my hypothesis is still unproven.

The thing I find most funny about vegetarians is that they are all obsessed with food. The fact that they are so restricted in their choices means that they always have to have a back-up plan or lunch-box full of almonds otherwise there is a very real possibility that they will starve. Also, they all know how to cook because they have to cook their meals special from everyone else. I think this would be the biggest stumbling block for me if I was to renounce meat. My omnivore capabilities give me the option of walking into any given house at dinner time and eating whatever they’re eating. As long as it’s not a vegetarian meal. Yuk.

This is the first of many food related comics. And by many I mean 2. And the next one is more about condiments than food. And it’s more about cold-blooded revenge than condiments. Keep an eye out for it.

Peace out!